In case you’ve missed the flower, candy, card, and jewelry commercials out since early January—Valentine’s Day is upon us.
The expectations placed on this ‘lover’s holiday’ —a fancy dinner, the obligatory roses—can feel a bit overwhelming and, depending on how long you’ve been together, also elicit feelings of ‘been-there-done-that-box-o-chocolates.’
So how can you inject a bit of novelty into a holiday that brings new meaning to the word over-hyped holiday?
Licensed marriage and family therapist Dr. Paul Hokemeyer says there’s a lot to be said for looking beyond your wallet and the mall to reconnect and really feel the love.
“Carving out time to lavish attention and pleasure on your special someone is far better than a box of chocolates, a new scarf or an expensive meal,” offers Hokemeyer. “In fact, studies show that when it comes to feeling connected, we get more out of experiences than from material possessions.”
Hokemeyer says in his practice (and in his own marital life) time and effort seem to proffer the most rewards in terms of satisfaction and happiness. With this in mind he suggests the following ‘together activities’:
- An evening of at-home facials (or other spa treatments that you both enjoy)
- A trip to the local museum while you hold hands and observe
- A walk through the park together
- Taking a dance or yoga class together; the added bonus, it just might improve your sex life
And finally, Hokemeyer says never to underestimate the power of a good snuggle on the couch while watching a great on-demand movie or TV show together. (Pass the boxed chocolates!)
