There might be a million wrong people in your life, but when the right one comes everything looks dark.
M.F. Moonzajer
We all have probably had relationships and love advice from so many different people and places. We have probably had some from our family, grandpa, and friends. Not to forget we have definitely tons of advice knowing, unknowingly from the TV program we watch and without a doubt the movies. In fact, the movies had a massive impact on what we think love looks like. And last but not the least, the songs that we listen to every year new movies, songs, TV programs all are released for finding love.
What We Believe About Relationships?
We have got apps that can help us find vegan people, non-vegan people, people who love cars, who love traveling and etc. And some of those are pretty weird, and not only have we been exposed to so many different ideas and advice from what we consume. But even the people around us from watching our parents, uncles, and aunts to watching the people that we grew up around. All of these ideas have left an imprint on what we think about love and finding the one. All of these things have also put ideas into our heads about what the other person likes. You know, girls like guys who drive cars like this, guys like girls who dress like this. And this starts to form our ideas about what we believe about relationships.
Criteria Of Finding That ONE.
There’s a movie I saw, in the movie, there is a scene where there is a really cool suave somewhat of a gangster guy talking to the younger guy who’s kind of being mentored by him. He said to him: you know when you find the one when a girl does this one thing, do you want to know what that thing is? the youngster said yes. He added that the ideal girl is the girl when you take it to your car and you open the door and let her in she sits down and while you are walking around the back to get to the driver’s seat, she will lean over and open your door for you. And if she doesn’t do that she is out, she is not the one.
So it’s crazy to believe that there are so many different stories so many different examples of advice being given to us all across our lives. But I have found some ways that might help you in getting your one for your life.
The One Who Supports Your Dreams.
They support and mutually respect your dreams now that doesn’t mean that they are gonna do your dreams for you. It doesn’t mean that they are always gonna be cheering you on but it means that they respect your priority about your dreams. They value what you are chasing, they believe in it as much as you do and they want to see you get there. They are not trying to hold you back, they are not trying to stop you from getting there, not they want to restrict or trap you in any way. But they want to see you grow genuinely.
The One Who Is Present With You.
They will really be present with you at the moment. I love being around people who help me forget to look at my phone. That’s the kind of person that you want to be with. Someone who’s not distracted by their phone by their messages, by their friends by anything else when they are with you, they mean it by being with you. If they keep forgetting what you are saying, chances are that they are not the ones.
Those, Who Know Their Self-Worth.
The person is self-aware and knows their self-worth. They are independent, they were able to grow on their own. They have their own set of friends, their own set of values, their own set of priorities. Some of them may match with yours but some of them may be different but they are their person and not looking for you to complete them, to finish them. But they are looking for you to enhance them and help them grow. They are growing with you and they are gonna you grow too.
The Trustworthy.
Trust, probably one of the hardest, rarest things in the world, and I am talking about without checking. Now this one’s a tough one because sometimes you find out the hard way and some of us have been there so my take is that trust should be earned. It’s not something that should be given upfront but it’s something that is usually we have this belief that I either trust someone or I don’t trust them at all.
My idea is that there are actually layers of trust. You have no trust at the bottom but then there’s step one, step two, step three, etc which leads to unconditional trust the challenges. We put some expectation when were with someone that we can unconditionally trust them and actually there trust level is on step one. That gap is exactly how much pain you end up feeling. Mind it, trust is something that is earned. Don’t give it straight away, let that person through actions and their thoughts and their words earn your trust.
The One Who is Enough For You!
Don’t always need someone or something else to keep the chemistry keep the entertainment and make things fresh. When you feel like you always need an external form of thrill or excitement to keep everything special between you two’s. It’s a sign that you actually be connecting with each other.
Where Living Apart Doesn’t Affect Your Relationship.
You can spent time apart but can’t wait to be back so you are comfortable travelling in different parts of the world for work, study in different areas of world. Maybe in the same country or in a different one but you can’t wait to be together and the challenge is that we usually get frustated when you are apart from someone that you love will want with you start getting frustated and you take it out on them which I see weakens the relationship. You know when you found the one because you realize that you don’t lead that frustration affect your relationship.
With them, you find other ways of releasing, sharing that but you are making sure that you are not ruining your own relationship because of the frustration of not being together in the first place.
The One Who Accept You The Way You Are.
You can disagree, this is the tough one. People think that when you found the one when you agree on everything when you like the same stuff when everything matches. That’s not true at all, you can actually disagree with that person. You can have different ideas and you still learn to work together. In short, respect each other’s opinions.
The above defined traits are not wholesome but they are useful to a great extent. Hope this will help you out in finding your right one.
For more articles visit our website Fajar Magazine.
