There is no easy way to handle a breakup. You can’t take a pill and be okay the next day. It’s a process that some of us take, and it could genuinely be heartbreaking. We all have different ways on how we cope with breakups. Some people choose to be alone while others seek closure, but do you know what not to do after a breakup?
We need to know the things not to do after a breakup because most of the time, we’re so clouded by our emotions that we regret these actions. If you’ve been through a hard breakup or you’re wondering about what you shouldn’t do after romantic rejections, read through.
20 Things you should never do right after a breakup
Breakups can drain you emotionally and bring about painful moments and many questions. Emotional recovery is hard when you experience painful emotions, unanswered questions, and “what ifs.” Since we’re feeling powerful emotions and we’re hurt, we are susceptible to poor judgment, and with that come impulsive actions that we end up regretting.
So, before we act vulnerable after a breakup, check these 20 tips what not to do after a breakup.
1. Don’t contact your ex
We understand. You still have so many questions, and sometimes, you feel you’ve broken up, and you could not say what you wanted to say. After a breakup, you have these questions and the urge to communicate. Whether to fix your relationship, let out unsaid words, let your ex know about your resentments, or just because you miss them, stop right there. Don’t contact your ex, no matter what reason you have.
2. Don’t leave any communication open
To fully recover from a breakup, don’t allow your communication lines to be open.
Deep inside, if you allow this, you wish that your ex would contact you first. Being connected with your ex’s parents and siblings might not be healthy and may will prevent you from moving on.
Delete your ex’s contact number (even if you know it by heart), their social media accounts, and e-mail address.
3. Don’t stalk their social media accounts
This is one of the most common problems post-breakup and the number one thing when it comes to what not to do after a breakup. Don’t stalk your ex on their social media accounts.
Distract yourself from a breakup when you feel tempted to check your ex’s social media.
Sure, you may have blocked him, but stop yourself from creating another account to check what’s new with your ex.
4. Don’t remain friends on social media
Some people think it’s okay to be friends with their ex on social media because they don’t want to look bitter.
You don’t have to.
It’s hard to forget your ex if you always see their profile on your feed, right? Go ahead and click the “unfriend” and “unfollow” buttons.
If there comes a time when you have moved on and want to be friends, you can add your ex back. As of now, focus on healing and moving on.
5. Don’t ask your mutual friends about your ex
Impulsive breakup actions include the temptation to check on your ex through your mutual friends.
It’s tempting to ask a friend, but don’t do it for your sake.
You’re no longer connected, so don’t spend time, energy, and emotions on someone who has probably moved on. It’s time to focus on yourself and how you could move forward.
6. Don’t stalk and compare yourself to their new partner
It was good while it lasted, but now your ex has a new partner.
That’s part of life, and that’s okay! Remember that you’re no longer together, and beating yourself up because there’s someone new might not be healthy for your mental health.
Just because they have a new partner doesn’t mean that you should compare yourself and think that you’re not good enough.
7. Don’t stop your life
After a breakup, it’s okay to wallow. Let’s say about a week. Call your friends, cry, watch sad movies, and pour your heart out.
It’s good to let all the anger, sadness, and pain, but after that. Stand up, take a long bath, and start moving on.
So, what not to do after a breakup? Don’t stay miserable for more than a few days.
8. Don’t pretend that you’re not affected
Crying and being sad for more than a week is not good, but so is pretending to be okay.
Some people who refuse to feel the pain or accept rejection will pretend that everything is okay. They would become more productive and hyper and would go out every night.
Male psychology after a breakup talks about how some men may sometimes act like everything is normal even when it’s not.
There is no skip button for that pain that you are feeling. Allow yourself to grieve first, and when that heavy feeling has subsided, move on with your life. Call your family and friends to support you.
9. Don’t try to be friends with your ex
It’s possible to stay close friends with your ex. Some couples realize they are better off as best friends than lovers, but this won’t work with everyone.
Don’t reconnect with your ex and try to be friends with them right after breaking up.
You can’t force yourself to be friends with your ex. After a breakup, it’s normal to want space and fix your life first. Also, if your relationship was toxic and your breakup was not good, don’t expect to be best buddies after.
Allow time and the situation to be perfect, and once that happens, maybe you’ll be good friends.
10. Don’t let your breakup ruin your work
Some people feel confused and lack the drive to move on after a rough breakup. They don’t know what to do after breaking up with someone, which ultimately affects their work performance.
Instead of working, you might become distracted, may lose focus, and miss deadlines.
Don’t let your issues affect your work and performance, no matter how painful. If you think you can’t control your thoughts, it’s recommended to seek counseling after a breakup.
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